Stack O' Sides

Rev. J.M. Gates

Death Might be Your Santa Claus!!!!!

you know.... for Christmas!
well folks, I know this record is already out there but it was the only christmasy thing I could think of.... but you get both sides of the record! 
the flip side is standard sermon-spiritual stuff and doesn't stand out like "Death Might Be your Santa Claus" does....and it's a little scratchy but it's the whole package y'all. 

they made so many of these Christmas death sermon records. "Death Might Be Your Santa Claus", "Death Might Be Your Christmas Gift",  "Will The Coffin Be Your Santa Claus"... etc...
I'm still holding out that someones gonna find the record called  "Death will Grind His Shitty Boots Into Your Brand New White Carpet Come Christmas Day".

don't mess with death. 
or death gonna mess with your carpet.

so in the words of the imaginary gospel shouting reverend that lives in my head, I leave you with an excerpt from one of his sermons:

"you might have been planing a wonderful spaghetti dinner for Christmas. and sat and waited by the crock pot for hours while the meat balls cooked.
but while you were waiting, death was planing! he was on a bus on his way to your house. and you got everything cooked and all laid out and all the people are sitting around ready to have their Christmas meal. and your mouth is watering in anticipation because you can smell how good it's  gonna taste and you got the right amount of Parmesan on the spaghetti and it's perfect in every detail but right as you gonna take the first bite... DEATH bursts through the door flailing his arms and screaming some ancient battle cry that sounds like cookie monster charging into battle with Brave Hart and he kicks your plate right off your lap and spaghetti goes flying everywhere and the taste of how good everything was gonna be is gone from your mind. and the only thing left on your mind is: "man this is gonna take forever to clean up".
man plans, but death is a chaotic and disruptive sunovabitch that has no respect for other peoples schedules."

have a good holiday folks!!!!
and steer clear of anyone in a cape with a scythe and a skull mask.
...especially if pasta is on the menu for the holidays....
cheers~Stymee

download both sides of this record